It has been 4 days now. He is gone. I cannot believe I did this to myself again. I allowed Mr Buttons to take everything in my life that was good and make it ugly and evil. I wanted so badly to be a part of his life… but I just didn’t know how evil he really is. I wish I had never met him. I’ve died. I’m morning the loss of an idea. He was never real… only what I made him to be in my head. I cannot move. I’m paralyzed. I don’t want to be in this world another second. There is nothing here for me. There never was.