RIP Sonja/Heidi

Last Wednesday, I got news that one of my good friends took her own life. I’ve been grieving. I’m okay now, but I have my moments; they come and go. 

It’s shocking how you could be talking to someone two days ago and then find out they’re gone forever. It’s crazy how severely lacking our mental healthcare system is. I’m really pissed there wasn’t much else anyone could have done for her to change her mind. She fought the good fight though. Did everything she could to find happiness.

She was always a beacon of light for everyone. She loved everyone. Always put everybody else first before her. But she didn’t have any of that for herself. Without self-love, you have nothing. 

And maybe it was selfish for the rest of us to ask her to stay and suffer in her hell. Maybe this was her way of self-love, to end her own sufferings.

I don’t fucking know, man. This shit is fucking crazy fucked.

2 thoughts on “RIP Sonja/Heidi”

  1. I am sorry for your loss. It is devastating to have a friend end in suicide. You said she loved everybody. Some people are just so sensitive they really have trouble handling life. Again, I am so sorry. But know that she is at peace now. Suicide does not equal hell. I think suicide brings an audience with Jesus and a chance to ask forgiveness and be welcomed into Heaven. Let time heal your heart. Take the time you need.

  2. I signed up for this site today and your entry was the first I’ve clicked . Your bio sounds like you and I share a lot of past issues. Depression, anxiety, loneliness…all the things that came with our past lifestyle choices. Not a lot of people understand how much that “party girl” lifestyle effects you emotionally and mentally . I’m sorry for your loss. I understand all too well the feelings that come with a friend taking their own life . Unfortunately several friends . Anyways I’ll be following you on here ! Thanks for the read and I’m sending good vibes your way love ! ✌❤️

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