it started to build up again. my broken walls of what felt like freedom for the past few days has exponentially built itself back up. in only a few seconds my worries have became my nightmares and my nightmares are my reality.
see i’ve begun feeling guilty. put myself through pain and over time heal, or put someone who had caused me pain – through a lifetime of suffering for their choices?
why do i feel bad again all of a sudden? The last thing I want to do is hurt anyone and that includes those who have hurt me. but also i think i am afraid.
In the end, i just want closure. The closure I need is unrealistic.
Now the question is what depths am i willing to put myself to finally feel at peace