Good bye

Amelia told me that she wants to move on with her life, she just returned from Chinese New Year and after 10 days of absence, what was to me (a happy satisfying relationship) with plans for the future is now guttered. I felt defenestrated, by her words. I tried to be empathetic, I understand her situation and her filial devotion towards her family (especially her father and younger brother).  My shoulder angel- the objective rational side of me says I should enjoy the memories and let her go- no matter how hard that might be, I understand there will be a gaping hole where she was. Every corner I look I will feel her presence and her touch. She has brought a lot of joy into my life and I am grateful compared to all the other women I have met in the past. I feel a sense of shame and remorse, that I didn’t treat her better. That I didn’t ask for her hand in marriage when there was ample opportunity to do so. It’s my loss. My shoulder devil, somewhat pointless is urging me to keep her, if her heart is not in it.  Its a lost cause, no point in sunk cost..the run was good and now its abruptly over.





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