I write this as I fight to keep my eyes open. I just got off of a 10 hour shift at the hospital. It is now 08:40, and later this day I have a stressful task. I am taking my very first long distance drive. I am taking this trip, to vacation in a much bigger city for my birthday week.
Am I nervous? Psh…hell yes. My mind is buzzing with all the possible ways I can get lost. Oh!, that is the reason I am afraid of driving. I am afraid of getting lost, because as much as I would like to think of myself as a brave woman. I have to take into account that people are assholes. So, I can’t see myself stopping to ask for help.
Now don’t you worry, my love will be with me for this first drive. He really is a wonderful man. Sometimes I feel like I don’t deserve him. That’s a story for another time. Lets focus on this drive. Whilst at work, he sent me a loving text cheering me on for todays drive. He ended with, “If you don’t feel comfortable, I can drive.” I replied with “No baby. I HAVE to do this.”
I really need to do this guys. I’m turning 29, and its about time I start venturing out in the world on my own sometimes. I need to stop being afraid of getting lost. I also promised myself I would start living this year. I wasted my 20’s depending on others, and not doing what I really wanted. Well, I have one year left so I better make it count because I want to enter my 30’s with a hell of a bang. (fingers crossed for Costa Rica)
One thing a wonderful, well missed cousin of mine told me when I was a kid was “The best way to get to know a place is to get yourself lost, and find your own way back.” I’ll always remember him telling me that. It’s about time I try….but I will also try my best to not get lost on purpose lol.
Ps: I am going to test google maps for this trip. It worked great when we where in Florida. I am going to ask Panda (that’s what I call him lol) to not give directions. That way, I’ll know if this damn thing works as well as it did there. If so, step aside fear, I’ve got places to go.