hurry up and wait

“Hurry up and wait” all to often is the name of the game. Me? This morning, just like every morning am waiting to be put in the radiation machine. Tomorrow i will have an iv all day and wait for the chemo to be pumped thru me. I’m almost two weeks into the cancer treatments and I’m already exhausted. I’ve been so sick since since Friday. I’ve never felt anything more excuciating than the pain that I’ve felt since Friday. I’ve hardly been able to move. I don’t want this life anymore. I want something different for my life. I think I’ll change some things now.

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