still

Ian’s still acting like a lover or he was until that bitch said she was pregnant.  Sweet, kind….every time I walk by he reaches out and hugs and kisses me.  I don’t know what the hell’s gotten in him.  He’s done a 180 and turned the 180 back to what it was.  I can’t compete with her.  He apparently thinks more of her than me. 

Although I’m starting to worry.  His sex drive seems to have tanked out again.  3 days and that bitch announces she’s pregnant.  I wish there was some way I could get her out of his life.  Every time he has any major contact with him she pulls something and he shuts down again.  Maybe I should go ahead and put him out again.  I’m still absolutely crushed and it’s making it worse that he’s shutting down again as far as sex goes.  I’m scared.  I don’t want to be alone but I guess I’m destined to spend my life alone.  I want to  go at him but he has his pants on and I can’t get to him to start something.  I guess I’m just going to have to listen to everyone else and get rid of him.

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