[214.1] ~*Thu – 03/08/18*~

[6:25 pm]

I don’t know why but I had totally forgot to mention this in my “Bday’s entry” and I’m thinking about it now. My mom had gotten me a balloon which I meant to keep but lost. It was so windy outside and I was holding on to it but I lost it when we got to the car. Blah! We were walking for like five darn mins and I had to lose it when we were finally at the car. Mom made fun of me and said she would go to the lost and found of the Casino the next morning to see if someone had turned it in. Pfft! It went up up in the air!

The association called me and blah, I need a referral from a licensed social worker to really be part of it and I can’t have one. The cost is $372/year to be part of it and do I really want to pay that much and not really get a job?! I just don’t know what to do about it anymore. I called my friend to talk about it and she doesn’t know either. I think I will try to meet someone at the university and maybe see from there. Just seems like I’m at a dead end.

I talked to the girl at the funeral home and she will send me the information next week about the tombstone. She will try to see if they can actually make it like I did on the computer with the bike I picked. Mom won’t be happy cause I totally missed out on the sales as it was last month. She said they actually went up this month but she will still give it to us for the price she had told us back in Nov. 

I’ve become so lazy and it’s driving me crazy. I had a whole day at home and paid on top of that and I didn’t do shit. I could of taken advantage of it and start cleaning the house but nope. I had told myself I would start cleaning with the new year and I haven’t done a thing yet and we’re already in the third month. I keep looking at my floors that really need to be washed and I just can’t seem to bring myself to wash them. I feel that I don’t know how, every time I wash the floors I just end up playing with the dirt and not really washing them like I’d want too. It’s supposed to keep storming into tomorrow as well and if ever I end up staying at home again, I really need to start cleaning the house. This is just crazy how I don’t do anything beside the laundry, dishes and sweeping the floors. I really don’t know how I managed to clean so much two years ago. I was working as much as I work now and I still managed to clean half the house in about three months. Don’t know how I did it. No clue! When I’m home all I ever do is sit in front of the laptop, watch shows and play on my phone. This is getting so very sad.

I also realized last night that my in-laws never even bothered contacting me for my Bday. Guess they forgot about me, once again. Last year they came here for my Bday. I remember cause I had my breakdown during my Bday. I knew I was heading for a breakdown so I had took three days off and I was all better after that. But they had forgotten my Bday the year before as well. Oh well! I’m also still waiting on that money they are supposed to give us for the car. Who knows when we will see any of it.

I finally decided to paint my nail as I wasn’t doing anything else. I had been wanting to paint them for a while now. Beside that, not much. Watched The Voice and played on my farming game. I still feel a bit meh! I feel like I’m wasting time not doing anything productive.

I hope my nails are dry enough cause I want to go outside and shovel beside the house and behind the cars. I wouldn’t really bother with it but hub is working tonight and he’s been nice to me so I want to clean the car for him. I also want to take a nice relaxing bath and maybe try to put away the laundry but I’m not too sure about that one.




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