truth

I discovered on his phone last night that the woman is really pregnant and a 4th woman. How could I have been so stupid and blind.  He never was mine and never will be.  I was so stupid to believe I could ever earn his love.  His sex drive is falling off again.  I’m so scared I don’t know what to do.  I don’t know whether I should stick with him and hope he  quits all his playing around or just dump him and risk them all just being friends and him not dumping me for the pregnant bitch.  What should I do? 

I know I need to break up with him because he’ll break up with me eventually to be with that bitch.  She got herself knocked up with Ian to trap him.  I guess she wins.  He obviously loves her or he wouldn’t have gotten her pregnant.  I can’t compete when he love someone else and is having a baby with her.  I just don’t understand why he came to me for sex when he has her.  I’m so stupid. 

I should have left Albuquerque back in January when I had the chance.  I should have never given in to meet him.  But it’s too late now.  I should have never met him.  He’ll never love me….I’m too ugly and repulsive to love by any man.  That’s why they always cheat on me.  I don’t want to live but I don’t have the courage to kill myself and just get it over with.  I just don’t deserve to live…i can’t bear the thought of spending the rest of my life alone.

I should have seen through his lies.  He didn’t want to live with me any longer than he had to and then turned around and said he liked what we had and wanted to continue living with me.  He even had all the gaul to tell me he had enjoyed the previous week off, spending the time with me.  What a load of crap.  He doesn’t like me.  If he did he wouldn’t still be talking to that bitch.  It’s a matter of time before he leaves me for her.

 

One thought on “truth”

  1. You’re clearly not happy with this man.
    Girl! Get him out of your life. You deserve better. It’s hard because you seem attached to him but it’s worth it.
    Leave him!

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