alas

Last Saturday his sex drive was great for about 4 or 5 days.  But it’s fallen off again.  I don’t know whether or not to blame it on stress or what.  Although during the last 4 or 5 days he’s messed the bed but he didn’t last night and the only thing I can attribute to it is the fact that we had sex at bedtime.  That would make it my fault.  I feel horrible that having sex with me could be  causing it all of a sudden.  I’m at the point I won’t even get undressed around him.  I just need to dump him and get it over with.  I am so sick of the roller costar ride I’ve been on since we’ve been together.  It’s not fair and it’s not right.  Its so obvious that he is using me at this point.  Why can’t I just dump him?  I guess I’m afraid he’s being honest and really likes me and everything we have.  He went even so far as to say Friday night that he doesn’t want to share me with anyone.

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