I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing in school anymore.
My grades are back to ‘normal’. But I just feel so fucking lost, and I don’t know if I want to continue at Berkely anymore. I’m not saying I’m dropping out or anything like the sort, but I’m really looking forward to summer break. I feel like I’m barely hanging on by a thread somedays. I’m traveling back to Japan with Ayato for the summer, I really can’t wait. We both are just counting down the days.
Fuck. I’m so mixed up inside. So many things.
I dont want to drink anymore. Ayato just drinks and drinks to kill his pain. but I’ve decided to take Camus’s stance on numbing the loneliness. I am not going to numb it or try to distract myself with vices. I’m just going to endure it.