from William to Asa

It’s been insane today. I had to have my inlaws take Aryanna and Kennedy. My wife went to her doctor’s appoitnment. I felt awful because my wife started going into a full blown panic attack. I know she’s afraid of OB appointments at this time. We lost William at this point gestation. So she was worried about Asa.

We were 38 weeks when we went to the appointment with William and I remember the appointment clear. The doctor tried to pick up a heartbeat and couldn’t. She tried before we left and couldn’t get any heartbeat. She sent us to the hospital to get a nonstress test and there still wasn’t any heartbeat. The doctor decided then and there that she wanted to deliver William.

William was born later that day sleeping. He was perfect. As a funeral director, and being married to a funeral director as well (I met Hannah during mortuary school). So seeing a dead baby wasn’t something new. It was just difficult. 

For a week I refused to eat. If I could have refused to breathe then I would have. It was so tough. To grasp.

Now that we’re at the point in the pregnancy with Asa that we lost William, it scared us half to death that the doctor wanted us to go to the hospital today. There wasn’t any problem, other than the fact that the doctor checked to see how dialated Hannah was. Yikes to hear 4 1/2 centimeters along with her contracts she was told to go and get admitted. 

Right now my better half is resting a little bit. So I’m taking my time to relax and mess around with the hospital’s wifi. It’s going to be a long night. We’ve chosen the name Asa Henry. Henry was my grandfather’s first name, and being raised by my grandparents we thought it would be nice to give Asa his great grandpas middle name. Asa was just one of those names we liked.

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