I am not sure where to start — but I need a release or I am going to break.
I can’t remember the last time I was really, really happy. Don’t get me wrong. I have good days, I have bad days and I have days like today – where I am just living. I haven’t gone longer than a week without crying or wanting to cry.
I am weeks away from turning 41 and I am a failure. My job is just a job. My marriage is sexless. I have no true friends. I am not particularly good at anything. I have no children. I am in debt and every day I look in the mirror and hate the image staring back.
I am aware in many respects I am lucky. I have a lovely home, a husband that is pretty good to me (I am not perfect) food in my belly, etc …. but something is missing, lacking and I don’t feel special, treasured, loved. I feel empty and alone …. so so lonely.