The best part of work was when…

I sneezed and farted at the same time. I don’t particularly like to fart. As a matter of fact, I’m totally against it because I’m a lady. But sometimes we just have to cut the cheese, and we can’t help it, especially when our diet is a little fibrous. My allergies had been bothering me all day today. I woke up sneezing and I just never stopped even at work. I was in the break room when it happened. I let out a tremendous sneeze and a loud fart out at the same time. I was like, “Aw shoot,” in my head, and then I started laughing. Fortunately, no one heard it because they were all being distracted by some change that fell on the floor. I laughed, though. I thought it was pretty funny, especially after the past four days I’d had. 

My new job is just horrible. First of fall, it’s LGBT central, and I’m totally against the LGBT lifestyle. Not that I can’t work with LGBT people. After all, an LGBT hired me, and I was thankful, but then again, maybe she didn’t know I wasn’t LGBT, lol. I have really short hair and nails and I have a personality that often gets mistaken for flirty…with everybody. Also, I have no man, and I like to work on cars. Perhaps she did know, or perhaps she strictly went by the information in the application and hired me based on my past work experience. That’s entirely possible. All I can say is that things are a lot more different now than they were on my first day. As I wrote before ( I changed my username), I knew the restaurant manager from another job. I knew he was a queen, and I mean that in the most respectful sense of the word. I already did my preaching to him on a sister to brother level, and I have no intention of bringing it to the new job. However, he switched up on me after I started working there, and so did many of the other people. He wasn’t the one who hired me or put in a good word for me, so he was probably quite shocked when he saw me standing at his job. That’s not my problem, though. It just happened like that. I didn’t know those folks were going to actually call me or actually give me a job.

Hmm…actually…I could probably classify as an asexual hetero-romantic individual IF I believed in the science of sexual orientation. I think ACES actually DO fit into the LGBT group now. Many ACES don’t like sex. They don’t give a crap about men or women really. They could care less about sex unless it has a purpose OR they love someone emotionally first. I was actually classifying myself as an ACE for a while because it does fit me, but then I felt like accepting the whole list of sexual orientations was somehow going against the Bible, and I dropped it. Maybe I’m not an ACE but just someone who likes lovemaking to have Biblical meaning. But yeah, I’m a person who is so UNinterested in sex, it’s unbelievable. Yes, I’ve had it, but it was only due to love and the desire to have children. No love, no sex. Not interested…at all. 

Back to the work thing…

So now I’m going through all the normal woes of a new employee (awkwardness, feeling incompetent, being slow, etc.) and I have to deal with other stuff, too. It’s very petty there. Veteran workers like to show off in my face as if I’m threatening their jobs. Month-old employees treat me like crap and pick on me for making mistakes that they probably made when they first started, too. Even if they didn’t, they should never make fun of someone for making an error. Ah, and the woman who hired me already sort of yelled at me and embarrassed me once. Oh, and I’ve had numerous managers abandon me mid-transaction when they were supposed to be showing me how to do something. 

Honestly, I hated my first week. The worst part was when I came back from break and walked into a mess. I somehow got blamed for the mess as if I had done something wrong…but I wasn’t even there. Then I literally heard the girl blame the mess on me as if everything I typed was now a mistake because I made one mistake hours ago.

One of the girls had the audacity to try to coax me to stay on my way out the door today, too. Wha??? Weren’t you the one who just made a total all-day joke out of a mistake I made three hours ago? And you think I’d want to…stay after that? I wanted to say that, but I kept my composure about everything until I left. The Lord sure heard an earful, though. Oh,  griped, whined, and everything else. I don’t have anyone to talk to in this little world down here, so I mostly send my thoughts and troubles to Him. 

The job itself was okay. It’s something that  I can grasp and get better at eventually. The customers weren’t too bad. I had to bite my tongue once on a really rude guy who ripped receipts up in my face and yelled at me. Honestly, the worst part of it was the people who are supposed to be my bosses and my teammates. They all acted like little brats and bullies, and the mature woman should know better than that crap. 

The sad part is that it doesn’t get better anywhere else. This is just the condition of the majority of the people in the world. Work is like that when you don’t work for yourself. A good corporate job can remind you of just how much people suck and also of just how much you have to stay in tune and in touch with the Heavenly Father to find the strength to deal with it. 

I don’t know what I’m going to do to be honest. I’d like to get those health benefits, but I don’t know if I can make it 90 days. Hell, I don’t even know if I want to save my kidneys if I have to go through that to do so. I mean, it’s not that big a deal, is it? I’m not sure why Queen has a problem with me working there. I don’t care what he does anymore. I said what I had to say to him. He knows in his heart that His Creator doesn’t like it, and he knows that he will need to answer for it. I don’t have another word to say to him about it. I’ve done my part. It’s his life. If I make him feel uncomfortable, then that’s just too bad. If he’s ashamed of it, maybe he shouldn’t be doing it, but that has nothing to do with work, and I don’t even work in the restaurant with him.

As for the veteran employees, I’m just there to work. I’m there for some benefits. Nothing more, nothing less. Yes, the hiring manager asked me if I considered management, but that doesn’t mean that I do. And even if I do, it doesn’t mean that I’ll get it. I don’t particularly want that responsibility. 

Yeah, I hated my first week of work, but then again, I hated all my previous jobs, too. I mean, I hated the same elements that I’ve always hated: cliques, tattle tales, bullies, unnecessary competition, cattiness and so forth. 

This doesn’t sound very godly, but it’s honest. The best part of my workday today was the fart. I only regret that no one was in that break room with me to receive it in their nostrils. Someone should have been on the receiving end of that poo-poo smell just like they put me on the receiving end of theirs all week long. 

Leave a Comment:

SCROLL TO TOP