Good Throbbing

I’m okay. As with any other type of emotional pain, I go through short spurts of discomfort, but for the most part, I’m fine. I always heal, but the healing process is similar to a physical wound’s healing. I get a scab. Sometimes it still throbs, etc.

I don’t expect to be bothered by this for years or anything. Heck, I don’t even expect it to bother me in another week, but it does still sting a little bit as of now. It’s not so much the loss of X dollars an hour or the medical benefits or even the cutesy uniforms. Nope, the mobbing ( is the only thing that bothers me, the fact that I walked into that mess and allowed myself to be mobbed even for a few days. On day one, I didn’t know, but on day 2, I should have left.

I pray that my discernment gets better, lol. Sometimes I’m right on top of stuff, and other times, I still believe that everyone can simply just get along. It’s a nice concept, but actually, it’s not biblical. I know the Word splits and divides people, so it wasn’t very realistic for me to think that someone with my beliefs and people with their beliefs were going to co-exist like nothing was wrong. Technically and quite realistically, those people were my enemies, and I was theirs. Why? Because if they were living lives that were unbiblical, then they were enemies of the Father. That’s the non-sugarcoated truth of the matter. You’re either with “God,” or you’re against him. If you’re doing a present abomination, then you’re presently against Him. That can change later, but presently, you’re against Him.

God sometimes allows painful things to happen to steer a wandering sheep back where he or she belongs. Long story short: I didn’t belong on that job, and the pain was probably the only thing that was going to get me out of there to start trying to get my medical coverage elsewhere.

It turns out that I may qualify for a subsidy, and I don’t have to work for any specific employer to get it. I just have to have a low income, which I do, and I have to prove that I don’t qualify for Medicaid, which I don’t because I’m not pregnant or caring for a minor child at this time. The Father always makes a way for you to get what you need if you take the exit that He shows you and follow His path.

It turns out that the part-time job had some goodies that I was eligible to sign up for, as well. That company offers some useful stuff to its part-timers that many people probably don’t even realize they can have. I just happened to be wandering around in the portal, and I found some very interesting stuff.

Furthermore, the hospital ended up approving me for charity care. I sent them my proof of income, which clearly shows a state of poverty even though I work. They eliminated almost the whole bill. I still have to pay some of it, but I can live with the little bit that’s left.

So, I think I’ll be okay. I just need to take from this experience the lessons that it taught me and learn to talk to my Father before I do stuff.

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