I’m still searching everywhere I can think to look….small cities and large cities.  I just can’t find anything under $2000.  Except in Phoenix Arizona.  I started thinking about it….Ian may be willing to go to Phoenix because he intends to ditch me and go stay with his sister or the woman he calls Michelle.  He claims Michelle is his sister.  So far from what I can tell he hasn’t told anyone about me.  No family members, no friends….nobody.  I’m willing to give him a little doubt because he claims to have ADD and is extremely stressed out and anxious.  I know that can cause loss of sex drive.  I wonder if there isn’t something with his health going on that he either doesn’t know about or won’t admit to.  He just retreated to the bathroom again.  I can’t help but wonder if he isn’t masturbating to avoid sex with me.  We finally did have sex last night but it lasted just a few minutes and we used to go 20 to 30 minutes.   It just didn’t feel right. Then again, it could be the stress and anxiety he claims to be under.  I don’t know what he has to be stressed about because I’m paying for everything.  I tried last night to make nice last night.  It took me two tries last night to get him to tell me he loved me.  A few days ago he told me he loved me without any prompting. I fear that it’s gone for the both of us now.

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