Saturday April 21st

Today is about to be the best day of my life. Or at least I hope so. Greg is coming to my house at 5. This is our first date. I have a lot of hope for this relationship. I think it could really work. He is the kindest, most genuine man I have ever met. He makes me smile all the time. I am nervous. I need this night to go well. I haven’t eaten all day. That is a huge deal for me- I am always hungry. I haven’t felt this hopeful since, well, maybe, ever. Brent and I just fell into a relationship with no effort- Craig was hard work always. This seems easy. I hope it’s that way when we actually see each other in real life. so far we haven’t even spoken. It’s a strange world we’re living in. A world where you can fall in love with someone without ever seeing them or speaking to them. I fell in love with Scott that way. He hurt me. I will never ever understand Brent’s choices, but I personally, am better off not with him. He would have never been good to me, but I was trying to do what was best for my son. Clearly he doesn’t give a fuck. I don’t think the son does, either. That’s all fine. I will make my own life. 

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