nice

He was so wonderful yesterday but not so much today.  He’s not being argumentative he’s just not being very attentive.  I feel like I’m having to beg for sex and compliments that he thinks I look pretty.  I’m tired of begging.  He keeps telling me that his sex drive will come back but it never seems to.  I fear I may have blamed him for my ex’s screw-ups.  So I’ve decided to back off and let it be but I still fear he will never make love to me again.  It’s been 4 days and he shows no signs of being interested in me sexually.  He won’t even look at me.  He said he didn’t want to be apart from me and Murray and he didn’t want us living on the streets back in Dallas  or having to live in a tent in a campground.  He wants us to go together to Phoenix.   I’m afraid I won’t be able to get us housing.  If that happens he’ll be able to get housing because his sister is there.  I’m sure she will be more than happy to take Murray.  But that still leaves me out in the cold.  I hope I can find a tent city to camp at until I can find housing for myself.  I’ll bet Ian won’t be willing to come back to me then.

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