I’m Beth..not Bridget Jones.

Hello/Bonjour/Guten Tag 

My name is Beth Anne Leigh not by birth but that isn’t of no concern to you lot 😀

The other night My friend of 20 years and I were talking and she basically said she wanted me to start a journal because back when we were teens I wrote a diary everyday and she used to read it. She said “Beth you remind me of Bridget Jones I’m like Excuse me Im nothing like Renee Zellweger I mean I’m twenty times the size of Renee Zellweger..anyway this isn’t the actual point Beth Please get on with it..So I’m like Bridget Jones and she wanted me to put my pen to paper once more and write a journal so I have obliged my beautiful mon amiè and put my pen to paper. well my finger to Keyboard anyway…Im too old and lazy to write anymore (Haha)

This is just a introductionary Post more or less 🙂

So what can I say about me I’m 31 years young. I live in a block of flats which consists of nutters, raging alcoholics and some who are on the strange side of life but hey we are all a little weird. I live with my 39 year old partner who rattles on like he’s 89… And my slightly psychotic Cockatiel Dizzy plus my beautiful blue budgie Charley

We have no children thank god. Life is weird enough hell I’m weird enough my brain is a weird place to live I’m very neurotic my father tells me I live on my nerves which I do I do not deny this.

My partner is 39 and believes he is 89. He complains constantly about prices going up petrol prices rising the cost of my make up obsession..he can’t get up in the morning or can’t get it up in the morning 😂 (I Joke) hes a pain in my patella and I could really do without his shit most days.

I have a few select friends but only 1 I can really trust. You see most of them are snakes they will be kind to your face but the next day they are sitting around a kitchen table drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes  gossiping about how fat you are. Or how horrific your hair and fashion sense are.

I’m not exactly hip and on trend with my fashion my leggings should only be worn on Sundays because you can be assured I’ve definitely got holes in them somewhere. I always wear jumpers so would you if you had tennis balls for a chest trust me and my hair is always up. I also wear Glasses which I cannot see without I need a guide dog to just get out of bed in the morning until I find my eyewear. Im convinced I’ve gone blind in the night sometimes but then I remember I simply cannot see as well as I once could without the use of magnifying lenses

My perfume is always on trend though Thierry Mugler Angel (Take that bitches)

I only ever wear make up for special occasions I’m too lazy to put it on every day have you seen how much effort it takes I would rather sleep in thanks..

Speaking of sleep I hear my luxury bed calling me when I say luxury bed I mean my mattress on the floor because I’m too skint to buy a bed base or maybe I’m just too tight to invest in one…i do have a memory foam mattress so I do have a little taste of luxury just don’t get it to my myself my partner thinks it’s funny to roll over and flatten me and snore whilst laying on me. 

So I will bid thee goodnight and I will return tomorrow hopefully it will be a quietish day tomorrow but it’s me however quiet my day something will happen to me I made a latte today went to froth up milk and the milk went all over kitchen worktop kettle Tassimo machine and coffee maker..to add to it all lm also accident prone. 

P.S if you came here looking for serious content I am sorry you have come to the wrong place 

Maybe try the Dalai Llamas Journal I hear he is full of spirituality and wisdom and seriousness which you won’t get from me.

Peace Out

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