[254] ~*Thu – 04/26/18*~

[1:56 pm]

I’m currently between clients so I’m home. I normally take this time to go nap but I’m trying my hardest not to do so today. I’m hungry and I have no idea what to eat. I should of went for a grocery but didn’t feel like doing one and I don’t have much money left on my budget either.

Talking about money, I don’t know what to do. I keep thinking about it and I just don’t know what I should do. I really want my Wed off, especially for summer but if I take it right now without having my hours covered I’d be losing four hours per week. That said, it’s about $250 per month that I would be losing. That’s a whole lot if you ask me. I’m not sure I can afford to lose of all that. Hub told me this morning that I shouldn’t think about the money but about myself as I deserve to get two days off per week, at least for the summer. The thing is, I’m scared that I will worry about the money we are losing too much. I know hub is supposed to be making a lil more now that he’s salaried so that might cover my lost but bleh. All I’m thinking about is that we could take advantage of this to build up our savings. We still need a new decks and windows on two levels and the driveway could use some work and this and that. Arg! How can you not think about money?! I honestly don’t know how people live we no money in their name. Like my friend, sometimes she needs to skip food cause she needs the money somewhere else. How can she live that way?! I never ever want to be in that situation and it’s why I push so hard to build up some savings. You never know what can happen to you. My friend never thought she would be where she is today.

I had told myself that I would stop working Wed starting with my vacation in May. That’s like three Weds left. Time is going by too fast and I can’t make up my mind. Spring is here and I still have no freaking idea what I want to do with the deck. I was looking at it earlier and, no clue. In my head I know what I’d want but in reality, because of the way the house is made and where the baby barn is placed, I don’t think I can have what I want.

I’m also thinking about my garden doors. I don’t know if I should call the people or not. I tried them a few times today and everything is fine. I just don’t understand why once in a while it will open even if they are lock. I’m also getting pissed off at my old doors that are still against the baby barn. Mom-in-law wanted them and it’s been a year. They are just sitting there beside the baby barn and it’s driving me crazy. The worse part is that the people who changed the door had took them and I made them bring them back. If I would of known that a year later they would still be sitting there I wouldn’t of called back. I should of known better thought as it’s the in-laws.

I just want to fix the outside this year. I didn’t do any yard work last year beside mowing the law the very few times I had too. This year I want us to get some work done. I just hope that hub will be helping me. The only thing I’m not sure about is, the roof. Someone needs to climb up there to clean the gutters and where the pine needles builds up but I don’t know if I trust hub going there. I kinda want to ask my friend’s son-in-law but I’m scared he’d fall and sue me or something. If ever I end up asking him, I will make him sign a contract saying he’s going at his own risk. I hate spring, I just do.

I’m also fighting with myself. I’ve been wanting to go to Jack’s since last night. I almost went twice today but told myself I had to come home. I want to play $40 but I’m trying to keep it for when mom’s friend comes to town and go to the Casino as I will more than likely go meet her there. I hate having an addictive personality. I’ve also been looking at clothes a lot and wanting to buy more as I bought some the other day. I knew that would trigger my addiction but I’m doing good. I know it will go away after a while, I just need to fight the urge to buy more.

Alright, I should go see if I can find myself something to eat.




Leave a Comment: