I hate that I rely my happiness on you

I am always so sad. I am so sick of it.

I am in a happy relationship and I love him more than anything, but I feel so lonely. He used to show me so much love, but now that we’ve grown more comfortable with each other, it’s like I’m not as important as I once was. It’s like he has just stopped going that extra mile to tell me that he loves me or wants to hang out. Maybe it’s just because we’ve been dating for 5 months and he doesn’t feel like we have to be affectionate towards each other, but I need attention to be happy. Otherwise I will think myself into bad situations and will be miserable.

There is nothing more that I want than his love. I know he loves me, but I don’t feel like it’s as much as he used to. Or maybe I am just so in love with him that I just want more and more. I feel so horrible without his attention. I just want him to love me more than I love him. It sucks being on this end. 

I am so fucking sad. This probably seems ridiculous to anyone reading this. Trust me, it sounds ridiculous to me, too. I never thought I would be so involved with someone. I was never the type to rely on another person for my happiness, but here I am, feeling lost and alone. I don’t know how to fix this. It’s too late for me to distance myself because when I fall, I fall fast and hard. I don’t know what to do. 


Song of the entry: Gold Medal Ribbon – Pierce The Veil

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