Tonight

He came to bed early and stripped down naked.  I had hoped that he was coming to me but he didn’t.  I just don’t understand.  I wish he’d keep his underwear on at least if he’s not going to have sex with me.  I get so turned on and he turns his back.  If he loves me why won’t he come to me.  Maybe it’s because I can’t wear makeup very often…..it hurts my eyes.  Especially after that medication for the pink eye that I didn’t have.  I’ll bet he’s going to dump me in Phoenix because I’m ugly….fat and ugly despite the weight I’ve lost……15 pounds the first month.  I’m sure I’ve lost more since.  I’m just too fat and ugly…..

He’s gone back to getting outta bed when I get in?  I don’t know what to think.  I got out of bed and stayed out.  He said I didn’t have to get out of bed because he did and went back to bed.  He hasn’t invited me back to bed…..guess he’s done with me.  I flashed him earlier and he looked at me like he wanted to puke again.  I cornered him about it last week and he said I misunderstood the expression.  Guess we really are done.  I’m going to head for Dallas when he heads for Phoenix.  I’m going to give him a little money to get there.  He can stay with this Michelle person until he can get on his feet.  I wanted to believe he loved me and still thought me beautiful and sexy but I guess not.  I just don’t understand why he keeps staying with me and insisting he wants to be with me when I repulse him so much.  I just wish he would go to the rich pregnant bitch and leave me be.

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