Ian is not my husband but just a boyfriend that I mistakenly trusted.  He was good in Albuquerque but when we got to Phoenix he flipped on me.  I don’t know what happened to make him so angry at me.  He starts a fight if I just look at him.  He’s drinking so heavy it’s unbearable.    I called a suicide hotline last night.  He suggested that I call his mother and ask her about his behavior but I declined.  If she doesn’t know about the drinking, she’ll just claim I’m trying to bad mouth him.  But then again she may know or his sister may know.  Either way I’ll never find out.  I can’t help but wonder about his relationship with his sister.  When he was in contact with her last night he treated me so bad and kept texting her.  There’s no telling what he said to her about me if anything at all.  Even his mother referred to her as his sister so I’m sure at this point she is.   Unless he’s renamed bitch 1 after his sister.  I do remember she is fond of hockey too.  I can’t imagine his sister making him this cranky.  Only bitch 1 did.  I don’t sense her in his life any more though.  Maybe he’s making plans to bring her to Phoenix and get rid of me.  Maybe I was the sideshow to distract him until he got her back in his life.  Not that she was ever out of it.  She begged and begged him to come back to her.  Maybe I was used to hurt her and get her to “straighten out” in his eyes.  Maybe he’s going to go back to her now that he’s got a little bit of money.  I don’t know.

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