Late night tortures

I feel tortured. I tortured myself, i thought that letting you go would make me feel so much better, yet here i am feeling so tortured. We haven’t talked for two months, but it feels like years. I won’t bother you, but why am i always secretly hoping that you’ll bother me one of these days. I want to hear your voice, feel your warmth, hear your laugh, and just have you. I can’t have you, because this is what we chose. 

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