socializing and being tired


i feel kind of great today, not completely stress free but definitely calmer than usual. maybe it’s because i had a small crying session a couple minutes ago but… whatever.

i went out with my friends today and well, i am socially awkward so i thought it would be really weird for me, but luckily everything went really good. i was really happy to spend some time with them after not seeing them for 4 months or something.

but when i came home my mom got mad at something and started yelling and crying which got me in a really bad mood but it’s alright really, i am used to it. 

oh also, maxwell i’m sorry i never really reply to your comments because there is no “reply” button or something, but i read them all the time and you make me really happy, so thank you.

anyways. so long story short, i had a chill time with people i like today and it makes me feel good even though i am feeling a little blue right now. it’s alright, everyone has those days, right?

school is about to start in 3 days, 2 actually, and i finally know who is going to be in my class and one of my best friends is going to be with me so i am really happy about that, i really wanted to be in the same class with my other best friend which did not happen, but that’s alright, we can see each other out of classes all the time, like during lunch break and everything.

coming here and writing these down without worrying about anyone’s opinion about me feels really good. and even though probably like only 2 people read my journal, it’s okay, i am happy with what i have.

i’ve been thinking about how great life can be sometimes today, and maybe it’s my fault that i always look at the empty side of the glass, maybe i should focus on what is left in my hands more and so i can be happier.

to whoever is reading this, i think you are an amazing human being. whatever you are going through will be alright and i hope you also believe in yourself.

i called myself a “waste of life” yesterday and well… even though i make stupid mistakes and dumb choices most of the time and fuck everything up, i think i am not that bad. i have a purpose in life and maybe i will find out soon. thanks for reminding me.

i shall go now, i really don’t have much to say but i didn’t want to leave this place empty and let out my thoughts on today so i did.

i am really tired though, being at the mall for 5 hours can be really tiring. i shall note this down too so my future self can remember. 

see you in my next entry hopefully.

good bye!

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