Waking up

The toughest part is getting out of bed.  On waking up, I realize she is not there to talk to.  There will be no message on email from her.  She is shut down, silent.  Unable to communicate.  Will she come out of this, or is it final and she has walked away?

Things were good, then something bad happened.  Perhaps more than one thing.

I was there for her, it wasn’t my fault.  I know she was struggling, but she was talking and holding close every day.  Then suddenly she stopped talking completely without saying a word.

I know she cares deeply for me.  But did she walk away because other things got too much and she knew she could never have a happiness with me, and that in an ironic twist I became the thing she needed to leave behind in her life because the closeness of it just becomes a cruel tease?

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