Every day….It’s exhausting.

I was woken up at 3:30 this morning by Michael FLIPPING out down stairs. I could hear him screaming and carrying on and throwing things. I crept to the closed-LOCKED-door at the top of the stairs to listen. I don’t know if he was with Jerry or James, but I could hear him yelling about how since he doesn’t have a room he is getting rid of everything in the living room, my computer, the couches, etc. Then he rambled onto how he doesn’t care that his bathroom looks a wreck, and that my bathroom upstairs is a mess (It’s not). That went on to his favorite fall back of how I’m flirting with his dad. I’m assuming he was talking to James. I don’t imagine he’d say that to his dad. 

At this point, my eyeballs were starting to hurt from rolling them so hard into the back of my skull. I went around and tucked all the kids back into bed, made sure they were sleeping and hadn’t been woken by the ruckus. All was well, so I went back to bed. 

The disruption had woken me though and I was having trouble getting back to sleep. Finally about quarter after 4 I was JUST about to doze back off…when the texting started. 

Michael. Blowing up my phone. This went on until after 5am. I don’t answer it. I don’t respond. I try not to even read it because it’s such nonsense. But now I was even more frustrated and couldn’t get back to sleep at all. I skimmed over the messages as I took screen shots. It sucks he insists on doing this at all hours of the day, but it does provide good evidence for later use. He’s so fucking stupid and just doesn’t know when the hell to shut up. He’s going on and on about how he has ALL this money but is not going to give me anything for the girls. And he’s putting all his bank accounts in the negative intentionally for when I take him to court. (Which, I have no intention of doing) Then in the next run on sentence he says he’s going to start taking care of his kids….

Feel free, any time….I won’t hold my breath. 

Then it was accusing me of sleeping with his dad again and blah blah blah. It’s always the same rambling BS. I’m so tired of it. I’m emotionally and physically exhausted by all of it. 

I’m at work now, been up since 3:30.

So, the kids and I go down stairs at 6:20 am so I can get them going for the day. The living room is trashed. He broke a laundry basket all over the living room, pieces scattered into the dining room. The cough and one of his dressers was shoved out of place in the middle of the room, blocking the walkway. The Tv was half pulled off the wall, my computer was off. (I never turn it off). He wasn’t in his bed, which is in the living room. I instead found him sleeping in his dads recliner out in the front room. The kitchen was a DISASTER area. Food and dishes everywhere. The counters and stove covered in pieces of food. The floor BLACK from what ever he has tracked in and out all night during his rampage. 

Of course, the kids are asking, what happened? I just shook my head and got them breakfast. I took all my willpower not to start cleaning up the mess. 

Why should I? I’m so tired of cleaning up after him. So tired of fixing his messes. Just to have Jerry allow it to continue, and then have to deal with the mental abuse via text message all hours of the night. 

I’m so tired….

2 thoughts on “Every day….It’s exhausting.”

  1. Truly a jerk for waking you up in the middle of the night when you have to sleep, then dozing all day himself because he doesn’t actually do anything useful.

  2. this breaks my heart, i am glad you are able to at least share here.

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