Tuesday, October 9th, 2018

I forgot to write the last two days. Oh well, I probably won’t write on weekends anyway since I don’t even get out my computer to use that often.

I have my first therapy session today so that’s gonna be interesting. I’ve really needed therapy since I started to feel overwhelmed by the world. It’s scary. I’ve wanted it though. So why am I so nervous? We have to fill out paperwork and there is a sheet that has a bunch of feelings, such as depression, loneliness, and so on, and so fourth.   

I have a crush… and they know that I have a crush on them and yet neither of us act upon it. Taako, my moirail, doesn’t really like this person. And if you’re wondering, it’s Syn. I know that they have a crush on me as well, but I don’t know if I want to be poly again right now. I’m fine with being poly, but their main partner, is my ex-boyfriend from when I identified as female. So I don’t think I could do it. It’s just too awkward for me. I feel so awkward when Syn and Ethan are around each other. Ethan is trying to remember to call me Dave, but it’s just so weird when you dated someone when they were female then after two years of being broken apart, they changed their name and gender. It would be hard for me too.

This month is breast cancer awareness month. I just don’t know why we celebrate this so much when there are so many types of cancer that people have to fight. My family has a history of breast cancer, but we also have a bad lung cancer record as well. I don’t know anyone who celebrates November as lung cancer awareness, but I do. While people wear pink during October, I wear pearl in November.

I ripped my nail into it’s nail bed over the weekend. I was bleeding for a bit, but it’s fine now.

Thanks for reading,

Dave.

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