Why,Lord, Why

Its one of those nights when I get hosed. I spent the night in a cold car waiting for the “FAMILY” to be done so I can go back home and get warm. The cold makes my neurological nerve damage to wreck me. I miss myself from before the stroke, l was sick but I was an iron man compared to what I have become. I put in an application for this job for 20.29 an hour. I have been treating this page of my life as a reboot. I finally have a good idea for me, a who and what I want to attempt to become, no more being worried that I am not good enough. I ordered myself that Zippo lighter, cleaned up my winter coat, and prepared for the moment when I get results of my hemoglobin A1C test back.  Got my raincoat out to waterproof myself against the cold rain storms and snow showers tonight. I need warm boots and possibly some copper compression socks to wear under my braces. I think it would be better for my legs and my feet. I have tried to come to grips that I will be stuck in the valley and it has helped me to understand what i have to get through on my reboot. Time to make the trip into the next chapter of my so called life.

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