Get it together

I’ve been fucking trembling all day.  Since I woke up.  At the weight of reality and the up coming day I have.  And all the pressure to do all o have to do today.   I’m trembling.   Therapy was so good. But then it’s up to me to carry it with me.  And I’ve been noticing how much I’ve been using my skills more often.  Especially now while I’m in this simmering crisis.  When will it end.  I am a badass tho.  I might fall down but I always get up.  Always have.  And although I may talk about giving up or giving in. I haven’t.  Not once.  I’m constantly going.  I might slow down.  Even pause.  But never stop. Never fully.   Have you seen my light? It’s fuckin bright.  The brightest. And nothing will ever put it out completely   I know what I am.  I know there will never be any one like me.  I knew they would all realize it.  There is no one else like me and maybe one day someone will put in the hard work and get past the darkness and be able to share that light with me.  I doubt it.  No one ever sees past my darkness.  No one ever really sees me.  I’ll cpntinue to love myself and be the amazing woman I know I am.  I will handle these little boys like a woman should.  I might have let them hurt and mess with me. But NO-ONE messes with my children. Just watch me.   

One thought on “Get it together”

  1. Hey, you can do this.
    Yes, you are amazing. And when you get all wound up and shaking …
    Breathe
    Take a moment to slow down, wind down, relax.
    It will all come to you, you will prevail.
    You’ve got this.
    Oh yes, you do.

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