i’m not sure funny would be the word for it, but it’s interesting that for the first time in my life i’m actually trying to take care of my mental health and i am staring into a pill bottle with only one more pill and no refill. no longer insured, it’s looking as if there is going to be a lapse in meds. i just hope i don’t fall back into the swamp.
not that this new medicated me is exactly peachy either. it’s not bad at all, it’s just uncomfortable and strange. until today the depression has been damned. it’s still flowing in the background, but it is at least contained and available for analyzing if you should want.
depression for me is a comfortable place that offers no comfort. an old friend who is ok for an hour but then needs to go. i’m not sure i am ready for that dam to start giving way.