what ayato knows..

I’m back in San Francisco. 

I still haven’t recovered from the jet lag. 

I’ve been so busy unboxing and moving into my new place. 
I really do love this building, especially my apartment. Its not near Berkeley, its in the city, so Im having to deal with the bridge crowd but its worth it in my opinion. 

Its only been a few days but I miss Ayato.  I hate leaving, but I know its only going to be for this semester. Before we left his friends threw us a surprise dinner party to celebrate our engagement, it was lovely.  Also, we set a date for our wedding!!! Its a season we both love. 

I bought a wedding magazine at the airport because I’m really excited, but for some reason I don’t want anyone to think its already going to my head lol. Also, I’m not wearing my engagement ring on campus. Both for safety and privacy reasons, but overall because I really am in a bad situation at school, and there are certain people that I want to avoid all together. I am grateful I cut those toxic ones out of my life. Just have to endure this semester. 


Anyway, I feel kinda lonely now. Its a beautiful building but I dont have any neighbors. I mean not unless I make friends with them when we share the elevator. In the other house I was renting I had made friends with all of my neighbors. But I just couldn’t stand my land lord any longer. the good thing about this place is the security. even uber eats is not allowed lol. 

I miss my mom. She’s coming to stay/visit me this weekend. She’s so excited about the wedding, thats all she talks about. She’s so cute. 

Also my ring is beautiful. I love it soo much. He knows me so well. I haven’t posted it online or social media because I want this to be for us and our family or close friends. If that makes any sense. I just want to keep it for us, I don’t want the likes or comments from everyone, not yet. But I am so tempted to, my ring is sooooo gorgeous. I love the cut. I love the setting. I love the size lol and I love the embellished halo around it. but the best part of all is that it has a small blue diamond under the setting, hidden underneath, you wouldn’t see it unless i took it off and flipped it over. thats blue diamond is a symbol for so much we’ve gone through, but especially a particular time in our relationship which means a lot to both of us. I’m so in love with it. 


well I guess I should probably get back to unpacking. I’ve been shopping online and updating the journal. no wonder I don’t get much stuff done lol.




One thought on “what ayato knows..”

  1. Congratulations to your engagement Skylar! I’m so glad that you and Ayato both ended well and happy together! It’s a relief that you have such supportive and loving parents who will always be there for you whenever you needed! I think 2019 is gonna be a better year ahead with your upcoming new life in Japan! Even though your best friend is no longer around, but I’m pretty sure she would be able to sense your feelings and your love for her and her baby deep from your heart. It’s alright if you can’t bring yourself to see her at her grave because it takes a lot of courage to do it and I know it hurts a lot. It takes time for her family to recover from such miserable condition, but from another perspective, somehow because of this incident, her family are reuniting again and growing closer. I’m grateful that you eventually made a phone call to concern about her family members because it would mean a very comforting phone call to them. I had also lost my sister many years ago which her passing had tremendously changed and fixed my family for the better, so I clearly understood how it feels for her family now. I think if Stacy were to be around, she would definitely want you to live a happy life and not ended up in her footsteps with the wrong man in her life. It’s not your fault and you don’t have to feel guilty about her passing. Though it is sweet if you did something to show love and concern for her family once in a while, or just showing concern for them is good enough, but what I think most importantly is she most probably would also hope the best for you and to be able to see you moving on without her now, living life happier again 🙂

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