A little while back when I got home one day, I heard my dad talking on the phone with my aunt and he was crying uncontrollably. I only saw him cry once or twice in the past, but not this much. I couldn’t really interrupt the conversation to ask what was going on so I just stayed and listen. I heard that my dad have decided for my grandmother (my Lola), who had become ill for the longest time now, to bring her home from the hospital. My dad’s the doctor in their family so people rely on him, especially something as big of a decision as this one. I’m sure it’s very tough and terrible for my dad too. It definitely is a burden on him. But it was determined—no more ICUs, no more treatment, and she’ll be DNR. They could see that she was in pain and they didn’t want her to suffer any longer. They just wanted her to be comfortable in her own home surrounded by her loved ones. When my dad hung up the phone, he just sat there and continued to shed tears. It broke my heart, I didn’t really know the right words to say so we all just sat there in silence hugging and crying together.
He spent the rest of that evening calling people about the conclusion and situation. He told everyone to start bracing themselves for what to come. He also asked people to start preparing for it. He talked about what dress for Lola to wear, where the service will be done, who will be coming, and how much food to prepare for THE day. Still with tears in his eyes, he told them to accept the circumstances as this is part of life. And it just made my heart ache so terribly.
I grew up isolated from most of my family members, as I mentioned before, I grew up in different places. So I never really had a lot of chances to see them including Lola. I didn’t get to spend much time with her, and I very much regret that. Nonetheless, she never ever made me feel like a stranger, she treated me like every other grandchild that grew up closer to her. There was one time that she came to visit us over here, and before she went back home she gave me a piece of jewelry and said to me it doesn’t cost much but she wanted me to have something to remember her by when she’s gone. Every time we meet, she always has a big smile on her face, and like every other grandmother, food always ready on the table. She makes sure everything is well with me. She was a very jolly and funny person. Even at her elderly age, she was never shy to make dirty jokes with her kids and grandkids around. Or cuss. She was a lot of people’s favorite because of the way she is. She’s a beloved mother, sister, aunt, friend, and grandmother. She was a very caring person too. I remember one time I went back home to spent the holidays with her, I helped her with one of her goodwills. She cooked food and wrapped up presents to hand out to the less fortunates during Christmas time, which she did every year. She has a kind heart with unconditional love to share with everyone.
Today, I was given the news that heaven gained another angel. The day seem a little dimmer but at least the pain and suffering has ended for you, Lola. For all the times we did spend together, I will always cherish them. You will forever be with me. A beautiful soul is never forgotten.
“When the sun is gone away
In the darkness of the night
I don’t have to look too hard to see
That I’m living in your light”
Love you, Lola!